What's the new haps?

Okay. So I know I haven't posted in a while, however I do have a very good excuse. Ready? I HAVE A LIFE. I have a job and school that I must continue to prove myself worthy of having. I dunno. Its been kinda rough lately...on my part only (because I choose to do things out of order rather than set my priorities). I'm not the only one though. I recently found out that the number of students at my school (Florida A&M University) are really lax this semester. Mainly returning Juniors and Sophomores. Seniors are trying their damndest to get outta here while freshmen are attempting to keep up with the pace: Parties, after-parties, before parties, clubs and orgies. Us in between folk are just blowing by like wind. I keep telling myself that I'm gonna do better everyday yet I don't. I say that tomorrow's a different day and that it's gonna be different. Sure it's a different day, but my ste-lo is still the same. I know what it is...i'm lazy and still living off of my summer's high. Sooner or later I'll get it together (prayerfully before i graduate)...see you later




*MS. ISSIPPI*

Just thought I'd say Praise God for everything...

I FOUND A JOB...

So...last time I was here I complained about not being able to find a job...especially one that I knew I would enjoy doing. I am happy to tell you people that I, Lakeisha Danielle White, now have a job at Lane Bryant. I may have another job at Old Navy if I play my cards right. I'm so excited because just when I thought I was about to go home and work for my sister in the GNC health store for retail experience, here calls Lane Bryant for an interview and a starting day of the following Wednesday.

My starting day (Wednesday) I had an interview with a representative from Old Navy. it was totally awesome...the interview was smooth, straight to the point, and convienient. Not only was the Old Navy interview an hour before my Lane Bryant orientation, but they are both in the same building, Tallahassee Mall. I'm so stoked...I'll keep you updated on what happens next...

Sitting in Florida...

Yea...all this sitting in Tallahassee, Florida without a job...cut it out. I find it funny that by this being the summer, no one is really hiring for jobs. I mean Sears, Bath and Body Works, Toys 'R' Us, Dillards, Macy's...no one. This is a bust...clearly the pits. I just don't understand. Why is it that the nice, clean, willing to be a hard worker can't get a job? Yet these loners with failed suicide attempts, gangbangers and whores have twelve jobs. My dawg Shannen just said she saw a crackhead with a job...in the mall. The mall...really? Why does she have a job and not me? I don't understand...

Then there's the dilemma of not having retail experience that everyone seems to blurt out loud..."Do you have any RETAIL experience?" Forget that...man just give a sista like me a chance to prove that I can what little Becky Sue or Jasmine can do...you're selling clothing for God's sake. I can sell opened ketchup packets to a lady in white gloves...why won't you Floridians give me a mother freakin' job?

But that's okay...see my sister is the manager at GNC in the mall back home in Mississippi. She told me that if I ever came home and needed a job, then I'd have on. Here lies the problem...in Florida, minimum wage is $6.75, a quarter away from $7. Some jobs even start you out with more than that. Yet in Mississippi, minimum wage is between $5.25 and $5.75...what am I gonna do with that? What bills can possibly be paid with that? I understand the cost of living in Mississippi is cheaper than Florida but can't minimum wage be the same everywhere? This is clearly a bust is slowly turning into the pits...

It's Getting Hard...

Last night, I listened to my mom on the phone tell me about a few hardships she's been having for the past few months. I felt that since I always call her for support that if she needed someone to talk with...just to vent...someone other than her husband who is going through the struggle with her...then I should be that person. Why shouldn't I be that person to listen to my mom...she always listens to me...

Last night, she told me about how tight money was getting at home. I felt so useless, impotent. I felt like there was nothing that I could do to help out. I have no job, I'm a full time student in Florida and I'm attempting to go to summer school to graduate early. It just hurt my heart that I couldn't say or do something that would miraculously clear up the mess that seemed to have my family engulfed, wrapped...

Last night, my mom made me realize how good God has to be. Although she didn't mean to call me and vent...it just sorta happened...she said,"But we're gonna be okay...cause when one door closes, God opens another one." That's all she said...I just sat there in awe and thought, "You are so one of the bravest ppl in the world. To deal with the situation as it is and still see the brighter side." I noticed that I too share that same trait, that same characteristic. I always attempt to see the brighter side of things,"God has this thing under his control. Whatever happens...its for my good. You just need to figure out what that good is." I always tell ppl that...so why couldn't I have told myself that last night while I was in pain?

Last night, I didn't realize that I'm a lot like my mother when she made that statement to me. It took my Freshman sister, Karis Chandler, to minister to me that we were a lot alike and that God is still in control. Karis, although she's not saved, she's a Christian and wants to develop a better relationship with God. I thank God for her being there for me last night. Clearly, out of the "family" I'm the one that ppl tend to talk to about things...but when you're the "talk to guy" who does the "talk to guy" talk to? Karis...that dang Karis...she's one in a million.

I talked about everything last night. I just prayed (after I got off the phone with Karis and my mother) that God blesses me with a job that I could pay my tithe, give and offering, and send something home to my parents. That's all I want to do. Because I'm not thinking about myself...thinking selfishly...I know God will bless me because of that. Honestly, that's all I want to do. I'm just gonna wait on the manifestation of God to work and clean this mess up. I will look the Devil in his face and tell him,"Nice try, but you're gonna have to do better than that to get my goat. Come at me harder."

MASSACRE: VA TECH

As I sat in the Florida A&M University school of Journalism and Graphic Communications, I went numb. All I could do was blink and wipe away the endless stream of tears that form a river on my face. I watch in horror as students were being carried out of a dormitory one-by-one and sometimes two-by-two. How could one man send an entire classroom in peril? How is it that one may could kill and kill and kill again over and over and over? What were his motives? Was there something the school could have done? Many more questions continued to ponder my mind as I looked at the television screen in dismay.

The Virginia Tech massacre (as it has been labeled) is truly one that I'll never (for as long as I live) forget. I can remember the time and place of which I sat hoping to awake from this terrible nightmare. My heart went out to the families of those slain by the Asian gunman who has since been labeled as a loner. My mind immediately went back to the year Luke Woodam, a Pearl, Mississippi native, killed his parents, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend's bestfriend. I remember it being on the local news and then the national news as "Teenage student kills four and injures others". That was a complete shock...

Less than two months later, the Columbine shootings occurred...I couldn't help but feel drained because of the excitement taking place around me. I kept thinking, "Is my school next...should I just not go to school and try street life? Is education worth being killed for?" I just didn't understand what was taking place and why. Now we have the shooting deaths of 33 people including the gunman himself who committed suicide. What is really going on in the world? Are we living in our last days of struggle...warning does come before destruction.

I thank God for my life being spared...because less than a week ago MY LIFE was in danger. A fight occurred at a Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity house party after two men began to argue. Shots were fired, people fled, and I (along with others) was trapped on the floor under Nikes, Reeboks, stillettos, and other shoes trying to escape with their lives. I just began to pray and ask the Lord to take care of me and those who were at the party with me. Then I hear about this 23-year-old kid firing shots at a professor and his students, a residence assistant, and passer bys attempting to help....

Again, my heart goes out to those students at Virgina Tech who died in a learning environment. I pray for their parents and other family members that they not hold malice in their heart towards the gunman or his family, for it is God's judgment that shall determine his fate. Virginia Tech...keep your heads held high and continue to further your education in whatever it is you want to be in life. Life shall go on...so live yours to the fullest....Godspeed and blessings on your life. Amen.

The Finger Pointing Game?

I'm sitting in the library (a particular study area in the new annex) with three of my new project members. One is eating Doritos while the other two are sitting back listening to me quote the "Finger Pointing" game. The Finger Pointing game is not your typical ordinary game. No, because of what the game is...I can't say the actual rules and how to play however, I can say the instructions are in what is said, "This is the finger pointing game. Watch and listen to see who it is." These girls have written out the words of the Finger Pointing game and have started to scratch out one word at a time to get this game. I didn't do this...I just pouted and said, "I'm not playing anymore." They are really serious, but don't know how long it takes to figure the game out.

It was tought to me by my freshman brother Alex one night and it took me 3 months to figure it out. The Finger Pointing game is so simple and easy...yet it feels so hard to understand. There is not a limited number of people who can play this game. The more the merrier. The wierd thing about the Finger Pointing game is that it doesn't matter who you point at, and it doesn't matter who the "who" is in the game (referring to the "watch and listen to see who it is" part).

Its funny to see people sweat about this game and not know why. People get frustrated because they don't know how to play the game...it's really relaxing see others get mad like I used to be. "Why is it me...why is it her?" These are questions I'm being bombarded with, and I can't seem to get rid of them...they keep coming back for more. This is hilarious...I'll keep you posted.

What's Really Goin' On?

Okay...recently I just read that there is somewhat of a controversy going on about the media and its diversity levels. Somehow, minority women are at the bottom of the food chain, or shall I say "media" chain. More and more flourishing businesses are being created and minority women aren't the owners. Sure there are a few, but these small print shops and local magazines aren't getting the "play" they deserve. It's like, if you're not white, a man, or married to "THE" man then you really have to start from scratch (even if you're company has been in the "business" for years). Jet magazine and Essence magazine both wrote articles about this situation in their June 2005 issues. One bitter woman (who will remain anonymous) was livid! She was mad...to the point were half of the article had to be continued into another section.

Being a black woman who is a Journalism (Public Relations sequence) major...I felt her pain. I aspire to have my own Public Relations firm, cutting the middle man out completly. After reading what she's been going through for the past 12 years, I'm thinking to myself, "What am I going to go through in order to get what I want?" No...I don't let what happen to this woman cloud my judgment on the media or deter me from what my goals are, but I do think about what obstacles will come at me just because I'm black and a female. Let's wake up, America. Face it, minority women are out here doing what it is that we want to do, and if that's media sales...so be it. Stop attempting to put us in the dark...I carry a flashlight wherever I go. So all you people out here with the bright ideas of keeping my minority sisters out...click your lights off.

What's Wrong With...

What's so wrong about being a christian? When I first came to college, I was so filled with the spirit of the Lord and I couldn't wait to attend church and do all those beautiful SAVED activities I was so used to doing at home in Mississippi. Three weeks in Florida really changed all of that. I not only conformed to things of the world, but I hid my feelings from my friends about how I honestly felt about God. I couldn't bring myself to say, "Hey, I believe in God...I pray...I'm delivered from the things of this world". I kept wondering if there was something really wrong with me. Was there something wrong with wanting to pray...but not in front of my friends? Yes...there was a lot wrong with it.

If you're going to hide God from your friends because you're ashamed to say I'm saved, I'm a child of the most high...then you should know he'll hide himself from you. He will turn his back on you with a quickness and not look back, because when it's done...it's done. God says if you're ashamed of me, then I most certainly am ashamed of you. All of the miraculous works he's done and I wanted to act as if he'd done nothing for me...I could've slapped myself. I had to learn the hard way...I went through my freshman year of college alone. Of course I had supportive parents and siblings, a church who adored me, and was a member of the concert choir however, I was alone. I felt empty, impotent.

For my actions, I had to sit out of school an entire semester and hear God everyday (and I mean everyday) chew me up and spit me out. I understood what it meant to be his child then. He talked to me as if he was standing right in front of me with a finger inches away from my nose. I knew I had to get it right...not just because I wanted oh so badly to return to Florida, but because I knew I only had one shot left. It was either get it right (or make an attempt at getting it right) or die (not physically, but emotionally and spiritually). I knew I didn't want to die; living in a world without any feelings? I knew I didn't want that...so I straightened up.

It's funny how I see things now. I've been back in Florida since January, haven't bought any books yet I've made nothing (as far as grades are concerned) below a B+. Everything I've asked for (financial aid: Full Pell Grant; extra money: cousin in Chicago sent $140.00 just because; have an on-campus apartment) I've gotten it. I buckled down, stopped partying every weekend and began studying...hard. All I have is this one shot and if I mess it up it's back to Mississippi I go (nothing against my state, it's just I've lived there my entire life and I'd like to see the world). So I ask you, Mr or Miss Reader, what's wrong with being a christian and telling the world you love God and the Holy Trinity (Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost)? Nothing, absolutely nothing.

What Really Grinds My Gears

Why is it that every time I go to nice, relaxing place that's quiet and comfortable, I'm always interrupted by some idiot with loud music BLASTING from HEADPHONES. You know exactly who you are FELLAS. Headphones...really? Headphones were made so that a person could continue to enjoy their music while being amongst others in a room...yet the individuals that I'm prone to see each and everyday at school don't seem to understand the concept. Why can't these individuals understand that quiet areas are quiet for a reason. It could be that the area is quiet because it's a LIBRARY. How dumb some people can really be. No, I retract that statement. In almost every library, computer lab, study room, or even a study hall, these individuals have had to come in contact with a "No Loud Music" or "Quiet while in the library" sign one day in their lives. It's just disrespectful to do these things...knowingly.

Then you have the individuals who want to talk loud while in these quiet places...in the words of Peter Griffin of "Family Guy"...this really, "grinds my gears". I understand that there are just some things we as females have to get off of our chest; how a date went last night; who made a pass; who asked out who for a date; what the final score of the football game was (I threw that in for the fellas)? Trust I understand...but why must you females be so loud? I mean really...is it that good that you have to squeal and squawk all the way into the room, notice that people are looking at you, say, "Excuse us for being loud", and continue anyway? Not only is this what I call "Blonde Moments" but it's disrespectful, too.

*Take a note...if you notice that a room is quiet when you enter it, then more than likely it's supposed to stay that way. Not trying to be a nerd or "square", I'm just trying to turn you "outcasts" onto some new game...it's called learning.Dumb D's.

Who's Cheating on Who?

I just saw an episode of "Cheaters", a show dedicated to the "art" cheating on a spouse, fiance', or other respected person and not wanting them to find out. On this particular episode a young woman (we'll call her Amy) confided in "Cheaters" producers about her suspicions of her husband (we'll call him Mark) cheating. I'm thinking in my head, "If you suspect him of cheating...chances are he probably is." So the "Cheaters" crew followed him around for a couple of days and noticed that this man was turning out to be clean. He went to work six out of seven days, didn't have any unusual phone call conversations and came home to his wife on time everyday. What was this woman's problem? Well on one particular day, "Cheaters" decided that enough was enough and decided to call off the investigation (it was leading to nothing). As they pulled into the parking lot of the local Wal-Mart, they noticed Amy and Mark's truck parked in a secluded area (by the dumpsters in back) and said we got him. Funny thing is, the person in the back seat of their 2005 Tahoe wasn't Mark...it was Amy with another woman. Who just so happen to walk outside of the Wal-Mart and around the corner to see what's with the TV camera and crew? You guessed it...Mark. I thought this was the best episode in "Cheaters" history. During the confrontation segment, Amy couldn't explain anything...she was completely dumb-founded. Mark must have asked 20 million questions because his lips were moving at an alarming rate. Amy attempted to explain herself, but couldn't seem to get the words out of her mouth. I looked on in amazement. I couldn't believe it. I just don't understand why she did what she did. Not the cheating itself, but the calling "Cheaters" to investigate whether or not Mark was cheating...he's the victim. Who would've thought the accused would turn out to be the victim. I just had to right this down because it was the funniest thing I'd ever seen on "Cheaters".

Which brings me to this question...why do people cheat? I'm not going into the whole "Who cheats more" or "Who's the better cheater" Men or Women?" crap...that's only gonna cause an argument! But knowing how people are, someone is gonna respond to this and tell their story about how some guy/girl broke their heart and that the men/women cheat more.